Hey guys! I'm sitting in Mocha now-can't believe it's my last time! I have some sweet henna drying right now on my arm that a girl in the slums did for me :) Sorry i haven't written in a week, but a lot has been going on. Some miracles which have been great and some attempts by the devil to discourage me. Saturday, the day i set up to fast for Nayna and Asha, I woke up with the flu. But it just made fasting easier :P It sort of went away on Sunday, and then hit hard again Monday, trying to keep me from going to work i think. I'm feeling better today, even though i have to watch what i eat.

Thursday i was walking down the street going to my day care center and who did i see with a bunch of women working? Nayna! She said she was going to another day care center, but i think she was lieing and she's actually working now, because i asked the volunteers who worked there and they said she wasn't in their class. So Nayna is safe :) I still am praying for her to be provided for and healthy and for God to give her a way out of her situation. Also on Thursday, a girl came into our class and i had Bharthi ask her if she knew Asha and if so where was she and the girl said she did and that Asha went back to her family village. A lot of families in the slums have the mother and children go live in their family village while the husband stays behind and tries to earn a better living. There's no way to be sure that the girl was talking about the same Asha, but I've been continuing to pray about Asha as well. As if those 2 things weren't reason enough to praise our wonderful and powerful and loving God, I left my bag in the back of a toot toot with all my money and my camera in it, and i got it back fully intact! Newton couldn't believe it-she kept saying congradulations :) And as if the fact that God completely just is amazing and answers all these prayers wasn't enough, other volunteers took notice that God has been obviously answering my prayers and a couple of them actually gave me prayer requests, which were both answered also!!

I have to get going but I'm going to be home soon! Tonight is my last night here so Bharthi is going to make me some delicious Indian food, and also 2 women who are taking a cooking class here are cooking for us :) and of course we're going to go down to the dairy tonight and I'm going to stuff myself of kulfi and jalebi (best dessert ever!) I am going to miss India oh so very much, but I feel like it's time to leave. I can't wait to shower all my love on you guys when i get back and tell you all about the people i've met and the places i've gone and the things i've learned :) I'm coming home with a heart full and a mission in mind-God has thankfully shown me what to do next :) Love and blessings in Christ,

Cassie

P.S. The collage above is from the art project i did with the kids where i painted the tree trunk and then they added their handprints :) it's was a wonderful time, although a bit hectic! The communtiy loves it and they wanted me to paint another by the other school. Sadly, i've run out of time. Maybe next time? :)

Almost done

Hey guys,
Hope all is well in the U.S :) Things are alright here-finally warming up! yay! We're supposed to get a few more volunteers today, which is cool. And we have rice again! double yay. And i walked to Mocha all alone today-first time walking somewhere in India alone. I feel very grown up :)
Yesterday we went to Jaipur Hospital, which is bigger than the dinky one we take Dolat to for his burn, and we talked to a doctor about women's health. it was interesting to say the least :) they have good intentions, but some of the things they say are so odd! Like we were talking about contraception and the hospitals tell women to fill up condoms with water or blow them up and squeeze them a bit to make sure there are no holes! Obviously, that is just not good advice at all. She believed we should load up trucks with women and force them to come to hospitals and get sterilized haha. We talked to her about Galupsha, the 11 year old who gets raped almost daily, and the 15 yr old girl with an abusive husband and prego with her 2nd child. Both of these things are illegal, but if anyone says anything then we will all be banned from the community. They don't want negative attention drawn to them. Also, the police are apart of a mafia you can't go to them anyways. It's just so frustrating! Dolat's mother too. Her 12 year old son beats her up too, because he's always watched his father doing it. And i may sound like a broken record, but what the heck happened to Aja and Nayna?!
i may not be able to do anything personally, but God can. He can do anything. Aja and Nayna have been constantly on my mind, and I've decided that i'm going to fast on Saturday for breakfast and lunch. Feel free to join me in praying for these 2 young girls who have disappeared to be returned home safe and healthy. God can do infinitely more than we could ever ask or imagine. He takes care of the weak. I am claiming God's word over these girls and I believe He is doing something about it.
Today at school (finally we got to go back! haven't taught since wednesday) when we got there Bharthi hugged a couple of the boys. I had never actually just hugged them unless i was comforting a hurt or crying child because i didn't know if it was acceptable. they have wierd rules here haha. i had never seen a child be hugged here and i wasn't sure why. But after Bharthi did that, i hugged them too. And then it was like this huge hug fest because the kids crowded around us, wanting to be hugged too. it was one of those things that's so sweet you want to cry. And Arjun, the naughtiest, most messed up little boy, was grinning all day and just a honey! He was trying to learn how to write his letters and everything. Of course, Satan has to try and screw things up. this older boy we'd never seen before came in and he was trying to cut the kids with this dull rusty blade he had. Poor Dolat must have almost gotten cut because he was sitting next to the kid and he started balling and he wouldn't stop for a long time, even though he didn't actually get cut. We kept kicking him out of the school but he just came back, randomly hitting the other kids. Argh. Well, he didn't win.
After school, I started a big art project I've wanted to do. It came to me in a dream about a year or so ago. I actually would call it a vision because i was awake but dreaming while i had it and it's coming true right now. I dreamed that I had painted a tree on a wall and it was really dusty and dry. And all these little children were putting their painted handprints on it as the leaves. So today i painted the tree trunk and wrote "the Beautiful Children of India" next to it. It gathered quite a crowd! But i feel so good-like this is the perfect way to wind down after my trip. God is here. I don't think i could ever doubt that again.

Hey all,
Updating from Mocha since the internet is down again. It's kind of odd but i took it for granted in the U.S. how reliable things are. In India, everyday nothing is guarenteed. We have a leak in the roof, the water runs out regularly, as well as the power. We've been out of rice for the past few days which means all we eat at home is chapatti (like tortillas) and daal (the consistency of spaghetti sauce). Our kids didn't have a single full day of school last week, and times of things change constantly. I've gotten pretty used to it, and it's not a big deal, but it's still really wierd. :)

I can't go too much into detail on my blog, but let me tell you guys that i love God SO MUCH! :) It's so cool to me that He cares as much as He does. People put Him down all the time. They mock God, and the Son who died for them. Even as they talk about things like Bible-themed porn videos they've seen, God sent ME here to be a vessel that He could use to pour His love out over them. Hoe does He do it?! I'm so thankful. Thank you God! Thank you, thank you, thank you. And what's more, He's come through for me. He has done everything He promised. He has kept me safe and healthy for this whole trip! I'm just blown away, and humbled. I think I half expected God to break one of His promises or not completely provide. I thought He was no more trustworthy than a human being. I'm so ashamed to say that, but it's true. I simply couldn't fathom in my brain that God was someone i could completely trust. Now I can. And it is such an unexplainable and amazing feeling. I feel so free and so SAFE. There IS someone I can completely trustwho will never hurt me or leave me. I'm relieved and fulfulled and utterly thankful. Like I've been running, exhausted, and I'm finally sitting down. God completely provides for me. I can go anywhere, do anything-and still God will be with me. Always He will forgive me, no matter what I do. Always He will help me and guide me, even when i get myself in a bad situation. I am NEVER EVER NEVER alone. The Lord my God is with me wherever I go. He will never leave me, nor forsake me. God, i trust you completely. I will follow You to the ends of the earth! YOUR will be done.

That's something else that is ridiculously cool about following God. He catches you off guard sometimes and includes you in His crazy, insane plans and they usually require you to do somethingyou're most afraid of doing. Then you decide you'll do it because when you refuse, it eats at you. And God comes through, and you get over your fear and you're blessed and because you're with God you bless others as well and even though it's just the wildest, craziest idea, it feels so RIGHT, so incredibly perfect for you. That is what God's plan for your life feels like when you follow it. Not that it isn't difficult at times. The first day and a half here, i was curled up in a ball on my bunk, balling my eyes out, trying not to barf, and simultaneously repeating "God will never leave me" and "Why the hell did You bring me here?!" i insisted that i wasn't near as strong as He thought i was. But God just sat next to me listening, waiting for me to come to my senses. Which i did. Meltdowns are OK-He knows it's hard. But it's like the pain you have when you're exercising. It means the fat is burninig off and you're growing muscle-you're getting stronger. You can then climb bigger mountains. You can go more places, do more things. It's all part of our goal in our walk with God. Did I say walk? More like our crazy, wild, white-water-rafting journey with God. Our number one goal as disciples of Christ. To become fully formed in Christ. The perfect, God-breathed masterpiece He created us to be. In Christ. That means who we are as God already sees us. In a sphere where the atmosphere is Christ's death, burial, and resurrection which cleansed us completely. The love of God, the mercy of God, the blessings of God, are all there. If you've been saved, then you're there. We just have trouble remembering that :)

Now may our Lord Jesus Christ Himself, and our God and Father, who has loved us and given us everlasting consolation and good hope by grace, comfort your hearts and establish you in every good word and work. (2 Thes 2:16-17)
Love,
Cassie

Rainy Dayz...

Hey everyone,
Today it's overcast and a frigid 65 degrees! we are all frozen, walking around in layers and blankets. Seriously, i don't know how i'm going to survive the weather back home haha It's also raining here-and we discovered a leak. It will probably be raining for the next week because of the cyclone. Not too fun to walk a couple miles to work in, but we'll live. :)
Today we didn't have school because of the swine flu break out (there were actually 52 cases in Jaipur, 42 of them school children), but Bharthi, Steph, and I had to go to the slums anyways to get Dolat and his mother and go to the hospital to change his bandage again. Bharthi bought him a box of candies, which he loved :) Bless her heart, she's probably just about the most giving person i know. She also bought him some warm clothes. So anyways, at the hospital, the nurse just ripped the bandage off and his wound was bleeding and she wasn't going to put another bandage on! there was blood just running down and some was on the floor, and we had to insist before she re-wrapped it. They wanted us to go buy some oil to put on it and then wrap it ourselves. Meanwhile there was an old women getting hooked up to an IV and shaking on the bed in the same room. That was the adventure for today!
Besides that we've been hanging out here, trying to stay warm. The power keeps going out, a lot more than usual. Two girls, Sophie and Philippa, left today. I was kinda bummed because Philippa and I have become pretty good friends. I wish them the best-please pray that they have safe travels. These girls are my age and they're traveling for 8 months straight. I give them major props!
Let's see...what else...i added a few more pictures on my flickr so you guys can check that out.
Also, I found this site from a group on flickr about the women in India. http://50millionmissing.wordpress.com/
It tells a bit about the women and girls in India and some problems they're facing. These things are REAL. it's really crazy and i don't know how to make you understand, because i didn't until i came here. but this isn't a movie. I have seen victims of bride burning and i know of a newborn baby found in a field last week and i have 2 missing girl students and this tuff actually happens. What are we going to do about it? Now that i know, i can't blow it off. Being sympathetic isn't enough.
I've been thinking about these women in the slums who get so horribly mistreated by their husbands and have nowhere to go. Making a home for them wouldn't work either, because the problem is too big. There are too many men mistreating their wives. We'd have too many poor single mothers and alchoholic, old men who would just raid the brothels and create more problems. We have to get to the root of the problem-the men. They need to be reached out to. The tactic now seems to be getting volunteers to try and help the women and children, but there isn't anything we can do really. If we could help the men, then maybe that would create a ripple effect. What i'm thinking is that India needs some strong Christian men to step up to the plate. They could teach the fathers and husbands here how to lead by serving. How to keep their families safe. I know this is no small task. But maybe starting sports clubs in the slums or something? Then they aren't out drinking, and you get that community thing going where they gain relationships. Meanwhlie the volunteers could be telling them about taking care of their families. i donno. But i think people look at the men and ignore them because they are causing so many problems, when actually they are the ones who need to be helped. They're the heads of the household. Fix the head, the body can be fixed too, right?
Better get going, but just wanted to update you all. :) Go and Be Blessed,
Love Cassie

Hey everybody,
Today the toot toot's were no longer on strike. YAYY! :) Although they are charging more than they used to. But really, it's like a $1 difference so it's ok.
Unfortunately there is a major swine flu breakout here-32 positive cases just yesterday! So all the gov. schools got canceled. The IDEX people wanted us to come to the schools for an hour to wash each child's hands and comb their hair and then go home! Ridiculous. They said we couldn't teach though, because we could catch swine flu. That's India for you. They have the wierdest ideas sometimes. So we're not teaching again until Monday, and in the meantime if we leave the house we're supposed to wear those masks. Please pray for our health, and especially the health of our students, because most of them would probably die if they got it. And it would spread like wildfire there, with all the garbage and the insanitary living conditions. There have been some kids already in the day care centers with coughs and fevers, but they tell them to just continue as usual and sneeze in hankies.
Suchi, one of the IDEX exec's I've told you guys about, was crying today because she's having troubles with her husband, who i found out is an alchoholic. She feels it's her fault because she married for love instead of getting an arranged marriage. I never would have guessed that about Suchi. It's starting to make sense though, about Newton and Suchi both-why they work at IDEX. Both don't really need th money because they have other jobs. But they want to help other women. Even though they themselves are struggling with the inequalities, they help other women in even worse conditions. I love these women-their strength amazes me. Sometimes i get so frustrated with them, and the other volunteers often complain about them because sometimes they can be pushy and very unorganized, but then it's important to take a step back and remember that we wouldn't even be in the slums at all if it weren't for these women. So what if it's a bit unorganized and the kids don't have much and they don't have very good teaching tactics-at least there are schools there. At least kids like Dolat get to go to the hospital and get flu medicine. At least volunteers can come and give the children love, if not teach them the alphabet. At least the abused women can talk to someone, if not stop getting hit. And it's foolish to complain because we're the ones in a different country. we're the ones who need to change our ways, not them. They run their business how everyone else in India runs their business. Another area of frustration is that it's hard to communicate with IDEX because they are all Indian and they know English, but not perfectly, so often we get lost in translation. But we're the ones who are here in India and don't know any Hindi. They know much more English than we know of their language. Okay, i'm making no sense probably-just rambling. I just am kind of annoyed because people are so disrespectful to Suchi and Newton and they deserve respect.
No news on the whereabouts of Aja or Nayna. :/ when we ask the children they all get quiet and then they all say no. They say they don't even know the girls, even though i saw the girls talking and sitting with the others in the beginning. Where are these girls?!
I rock babies to sleep often during school. They usually get carted to school on their sisters' hips and break down in tears during school, so i hold them and they just melt in my arms. Poor babies :/ They don't know what a mattress and soft blanket and fluffy pillow is.
As you know, we have mice at our school. Today one came running into the room and charged right at a boy and it ran up one leg and arm and down the other squeaking and hopping and then disappeared. it was the freakiest thing ever! The boy went right back to coloring. I think i prbably would have been curled up in a fetal position and would have to be bribed into staying in that school :)
I am kind of starting to be afraid about how hard it will be to say goodbye to these people. I love them so much! I can't just forget about them. Leaving this place won't make them disappear. There are problems in this world. There are people in need. I can't deny it anymore. And i don't like that i've seen how the stereotypes of America are unfortunately pretty accurate. There are people from all different countries here, and they make efforts to speak each other's languages and they talk to foreigners and to each other. Yea, some are really creepy but that happens everywhere. It's so important to learn about other people firsthand. To step out of your comfort zone and be the minority, and humble yourself to learn about someone else's culture. I never understood this until going somewhere else. well, i'm REALLY rambling now-sorry about that :)
Got to go, but if anyone reads this, i'm going to go to Mocha tonight so i can skype! :) I'll be on around 8 or 9 p.m. here...which is...10:30ish...?? sorry my brain is clogged

Welcome to the World...

i have had one heck of a day today so far. it started off missing the bus, which made us late to school. Then we did some "growth cards" with the kids where we record their weight and height and stuff. I found out that our Pooja, the girl who can't learn things very well, doesn't have a mother. Thats why she doesn't regularly come to school. She started telling Bharthi all sorts of sad things about her life. Also, there's something up with one of our little girls, the one who told me in the beginning that she wanted to be a teacher like me when she grew up to help children. In the past couple weeks she has become very quiet-bharthi didn't even know she spoke or was smart until i was telling her about it. Now this little girl bursts into tears several times a day, sometimes if she needs to go to the bathroom or if she needs water or for no reason at all. It's so sad i can't take it. Newton, an IDEX exec. who comes around a lot, told us if we wanted to help the boy with the infection that we'd have to take him to the hospital right away. so Newton ended our school early and had us take the boy, i found out his name is Dolat, to his house to get his mother and tell her. Whenever people get really loud or something changes quickly, Dolat gets very afraid and starts crying, so when school ended early and i picked him up to bring him to his house, he just started balling and got really frantic. I sung to him to calm him down, and then we got his mother and he was a lot better after that. We walked to a small hospital, which was VERY dirty and medial. There was a bed and it had all sorts of stains on it from blood and medicine and other fluids. A woman sat him on the table, like a counter, and told ME to take his bandage off, which was covered in oozing yellow pus and blood :/ The bandage was stuck to his wound, which must have been so painful. the woman started cutting the bandage right on the burn wound, which would have been excruciating but i directed her to cut it on the other side, where it wouldn't hurt him. After that the woman smeared some iodine or something on another bandage and put that on without even cleaning the wound. They gave him some pills for his fever and sent us off, not cleaning anything up.
After that we started talking to his mother, who told us that her husband was a lazy alchoholic and spent over half their wages on booze. Sometimes he beats her up, and he has sex with her in front of the children, especially their oldest, 12 yr old son. No wonder Dolat cries when things get loud or change suddenly! Also Dolat's other leg is shaped a bit funny and he can't walk very well, and the surgery to fix it is 16,000 rps. which the husband won't pay. Dolat's mother's sister died of breast cancer, and she thinks she may have it also, but the husband said if she dies, so be it, so she hasn't gotten it checked out. They have 3 sons. Newton told the woman that she needs to hit him back next time he tries to beat her up. She said the worst that could happen is she'd die, and that would be what God wanted. I don't know what to say to this woman. Hit her husband back? Is she supposed to just take all the crap silently? What would Jesus tell this mother of 3 in an Indian slum to do? I have no idea. I just don't. We sat in her house talking with her while Dolat ate biscuits and mice ran around.
Then we went and talked with Galupsha, who has the mental disability and gets taken advantage of by men. We found out she's actually only 11 yrs old. Her own father also rapes her, and her mother knows about it. Oe of Galupsha's neighbors overheard her telling us and came in the room and told us she'd heard everything and Galupsha was lieing. This is really bad because if the woman tells anyone, then all of us could get rejected by the society for listening to Galupsha and Galupsha could get in a lot of trouble, whether t's true or not. I don't think that an 11 yr old could make up the things she explained to us though.
Next we went to a family's house with 2 girls and a boy. The woman said she didn't like the place they lived because the slum is full of alchoholics anf it's not safe for her children, but she has no choice. They can't get clean water she said, but they filter it through clothes. She sends her children all to gov. schools and is determined to get them an education so they can have a chance to get out of the situation. Also she said she wants her daughters to get married at 18. The only bed in their house was what looked like a flattened out cardboard box as the mattress and a very small pillow the size of a handbag.
When work was over and we were going to get a toot toot home like always, we found out the toot toot drivers are all on strike because the gov. raised the taxes for them to drive so we had to take a bike rickshaw, which brought us to the wrong place. So we walked awhile and didn't know which direction home was. I was starving so i prayed for God to provide some food and instantly i saw a place selling Kachori. They're like puffy fried things filled with dried daal. I bought 2 and while i was eating, a young girl with a aby came up to me and God told me to give her the other Kachori, so i did. I thanked God for providing my food and asked for Him to provide a way home. Again, almost instantaniously, a toot toot driver who wasn't striking came out of nowhere and asked us if we needed a ride. Thank you God for providing, because we were walking in the opposite direction of home.
So that's been my day so far, and it's only 3 p.m. :) better be going now!
Be thankful today for everything you have, and know that God provides WITHOUT FAIL.

Hey guys,
Can you believe i'm over halfway done already?! i can't. I feel like i've only been here a week! but at the same time, i kind of feel like i've been here for a very very long time. I donno, it's a paradox i guess :) I love India so much. It's just my style-all the colors and designs and the comfortable clothing and the beautiful landscapes. And the people are so amazing. So friendly and carefree-they remind me of children in the way that they do things with abandon. There are things that can be frustrating here of course, but you have to see both sides.

Something frustrating would be that Nana and Aja, 2 girls i mentioned awhile back, have not come to school the past couple weeks. I'm a bit worried about them :/ I tried to get a visit set up today but no one knew where they were, or lived. It's kind of odd because everyone in the slums knows where people live-it's not very big. Anything could have happened to them. Nana, who held my hand the whole day and liked art. Aja, who had a beautiful smile and reminded me so much of my cousin Amelia. Also a girl from another day care center, Big Angeley, has up and moved out of the village. She was so sweet and smart and ready to learn. There's another girl with a mental disablility and men take advantage of her all the time. :/ and the 15 year old i told you all about who's 6 mths. pregnant and has a 2 yr old and is abused by her husband has moved back in with her parents to escape him. But if the in laws call, she has to move back with him. 15 years old! That's my sister. Some things are just so wild that you can hardly believe them, even as you see them.

There is good in the world though too. A couple days ago i went to Pushkar again, just for the day, to do some shopping with the other girls :) And on the busride home, Steph bought some biscuits from a very tiny, very old man. they were 5 rps. but she only had a 20 so she told him he could keep the rest. When the man realized that she was giving him the 20, i can't even explain the look in his eyes. I could have cried. He put his hand to his forehead and bowed and gave her a bag of his candies as well. And then the old man took the 20 and gave it to a man with a crippled arm! Both men left the bus and a young boy got on selling waters, Steph gave him the bag of candies. I just sat there smiling and speechless, thinking about the chain reaction of one good thing leading to a bunch of others. I don't think anyone involved was a Christian. Could it be that God blesses everyone, THROUGH everyone? It was a new thought but God can do anything right? Who says that He can't use someone who doesn't believe in Him to show someone else who doesn't believe in Him His love? i suppose that's a bit confusing isn't it? :)

Two boys who live next door came onto our roof while i was coloring stuff for school and started flying kites. They're very nice boys, and they were talking to me a bit, and I started thinking about kite runner and how that took place in the east and probably looked a bit like the scene in front of me. Then one of them said he was going to try and cut the other's kite, and i felt like i was seriously IN the book! :) It was the most bizarre feeling, like i accidentally walked right into a movie scene and got written into the movie or something. That book became very real then, while i was watching the boys make their kites flip and spin (he did cut his friend's kite). Just a wierd random thing but yea :)

Better get going! i've added some more pictures on flickr so be sure to check them out!
Have a blessed day, love you all
Cassie

Great Week!

Hello there everybody!
What a week! It's been a great week though. I went to the Rajmandir (sp?) theatre which is quite famous and saw a Bollywood surfer movie, Blue. it was hilarious :) and also intersting because they didn't kiss at all in the movie! instead, they did lots of awkward sex positions and all the women wore practically nothing. And the men were really stereotypical-the wrestled a shark, boxed, drove fast cars, drank beer, were rich, and had high speed races all in the first 15 minutes :) It's fun because the audience goes crazy during the movie. Also, the theatre was gorgeous!
Work has been great this week. I can't believe how fast i've adapted and learned how to teach a bunch of wild slum children who don't speak my language :) Also, I got a translator, and then another translator, and now another volunteer! I think IDEX must have noticed that my class has increased from about 17 kids to about 30 kids :) God is providing for me so much! Here i started the week completely alone, and by today i have 3 other people helping me and the children are learning so much! The couldn't even tell me what a letter was unless i asked in order, and today they were saying them with no problem. Also, the other volunteer who is with me, Bharthi, is half Indian and speaks fluent Hindi!!! AND she's a lot like me in the sense that she really wants to come up with creative ways to teach these kids, and she has a degree in teaching! I've been praying for a way to be able to use my ideas because before i couldn't explain them beacause of the language barrier, and now i have no language barrier and double the ideas because Bharthi has a bunch too! God is so good. I'm telling you guys-He really does provide and i'm not even kidding. He provides for me every single day and i feel like a broken record thanking Him all the time, but it's just SO COOL! :)
Also this week i made a couple steps in some ideas i've had. One is a class plant. Yesterday i was given a big clay pot and i decorated it :) I wrote "Always Keep Growing" on it, which is something my own 1st grade teacher wrote on a plant pot for me and i still have it. It feels kind of like a blessing sometimes-no matter what i'm always moving forward. I wish i knew where she was so i could tell her that little thing is being carried on in the slums of Jaipur, India! Also this week I got a box and i'm going to decorate that and it's going to be the class dust bin. I'm going to try teaching them about putting garbage in a separate place, even if once the dust bin gets filled there's nowhere to put it except in the fields :/ I can't control that part f the situation though, only the way my class handles its garbage.
The "jew"/zoo was really great this week also :) The children were SO happy and very well behaved. I was blown away! These children really are fabulous. They just happened to be born somewhere different from me. And actually i see it shaping them into the good children they are. God has a plan for them and their situation would only add more to it if they would choose to follow Him.
Today was sports day and all the children from the 3 schools came out to the field and we all played games. I taught them duck, duck, goose and it was a big hit :) even the IDEX executives wanted to play. IDEX is pretty unorganized and can be frustrating, but the complaints have really payed off. they are coming up with some really cool ideas for the schools. Like now we do fun things every week, like the zoo. and we wash the children's faces and cut their nails and comb their hair to teach them about hygiene. We're on the right track here :)
So yea...that's what's up in Jaipur, India. Have you guys seen the thing about the fire that was here? We could see that from our roof. And the 7 school children who got hit by a train? That was really sad. The crazy thing here is that whenever there's a train or car accident, a giant mob developes and riots break out. It gets really dangerous!
One of the children in my class who i've really gotten to like has a fever :/ he's pretty young. He never involves himself with the kids. he just sits on the wall next to me and usually he acts like he doesn't like me even though i know he does :) But when i first got here i noticed that he had a blister burn thing with a bunch of oozing yellow stuff on it. and it has continued to look like that. And now with the fever, Bharthi and i were wondering if maybe he has an infection? We're going to visit his mother and talk to her about it next week.
Well, i better go eat my veggies, rice, and chapatti. Talk to you guys later! Take care. Are you guys all staying healthy over there with the weather changes and stuff? I'm praying for you all!
Cassie

Update

Hey All! Hope you're doing well. I can't go much into detail about too much because so much happens sometimes it's too much to go into depth about everything! :) you know me-ever the analyzer.
Went to Jaisalmer this past weekend. It was REALLY hot during the day (who woulda guessed in the desert?) and really dirty there. I almost stepped on a big dead rat on the way to our hotel! But there were a lot of cool antique-type stuff and there were a lot of crazy awesome doorways and architecture there. Oh yea. and we had to run and jump onto a high step because a cow was charging us lol. i felt like i was in Spain for a sec...
The camel safari was sweet! we took a jeep out more into the desert, then got on camels (mine's name was Asid, like Uh-seed) and went further into the desert. It's not what i expected. i thought there would be tons of sand and mirages and it would be unbearably hot, but it wasn't. The heat was intense, but not too bad. and there were TONS of bushes and trees and cacti. We got to some dunes though, and slept there. The moon was really bright so we had to wait til the moon set at about 3-4 a.m. to really see the stars. They were gorgeous-the shooting stars were unbelievably bright. We slept on a blanket right there on the sand. Our biggest threats were these giant beatles with tracks that had the appearance and size of bike tracks. They're harmless, but HUGE. We ate with our hands and some small boys who came along washed our dishes with sand. mmm sanitary. the chai tasted slightly salty by the next afternoon :] At night though they started a fire and we sung sungs like A-winga-whap from the lion king and i will survive, which made the camel guides cheer and whistle and start dancing like mad around the fire :) They sung some indian sungs and banged on the water jug. it was some good times :) But MAN am i sore! and i thougt biking to millenium park that one time was bad-at least my bike seat isn't 4 ft wide!! Oh Camels... So yea. I decided that if Napolean Dynamite was an animal, he would most definately be a camel :) they are REALLY awkward haha
Today i went to work and had no translator, which was kind of intimidating. I have the craziest kids from all the 3 schools. The boys literally beat each other up. they choke and punch and when i try to break them up, they kick each other. Someone is always crying. and they steal food and chalk from the little ones. it can be so hard to love these kids. on the other hand, what else do they know? Old men randomly come in the school sometimes when it's really wild and they start hitting the children with sticks these whip-like reeds and shouting. What can i do? I wish i knew their language. I would like to teach them about kindness and giving; things they don't teach in the schools at all. Also i got permission to buy a plant for the class. i'm trying to decide what kind. The older kids are going to be responsible for watering it. They need to learn about the earth-about caring for things. A huge problem that would fix a lot in the slums is the garbage issue. no one will pick up their garbage because they are untouchables, so they have no garbage bins. that's why they live near fields-so they can fill the fields with all their garbage. it's horrible. We have to educate the kids on staying healthy, but how can they when they live in pure refuse?
Tomorrow we're taking the older ones to the zoo (they pronounce it the "jew" haha) which i'm looking forward to a lot :)
Some of the other volunteers working for women's empowerment went to a hospital and saw some pretty interesting things. the birthing room consisted of a bunch of tables which the women all lay on, and there's a slide that goes down into a bucket. no curtains or even light. there was 1 doctor to 6 women in labor. crazy huh? no wonder most women want to stay at home, even though often times that means even more unsanitary conditions that kill the baby, the mother, or both. They met a girl who's 15 and 6 months prego. and she already has another child! and her husband beats her...she had a huge knife wound scar. In Pushkar we saw a few women who were victims of bride burning. that's the worst. i don't think i've ever seen anything more haunting in my entire life. those are the kinds of things you don't even take pictures of...the women were laying silently in the middle of the road wrapped in bandages and covered in black viels. Most had small babies at their sides. An exposed leg of one woman showed deep red burn scars. It's just horrific.
The woman who takes care of us, Fatima, is a middle aged Muslim woman. She was married at 16 by an arranged marriage, but the man quickly divorced her, saying she was too ugly. She's not allowed to remarry. Women. I want to do something about all this. How do you stop things like bride burning? What does it take to sustain a place like the slums, and make it thrive? I think about these questions over and over. I think the slum needs a community garden. They need to learn that society is there to contribute to and take part in, not to take from with the assumption that everyone you take from will take from someone else. That will keep everyone from drowning, but it won't ever get them to shore. hmm...
I saw a cockroach the size of an escalade in our bathroom...yummy.
better get going though...this is so long! I have a cold that's not too fun. i think it's from all the dust and pollution here. Please pray for healing :) Love you all! keep me up to date on your lives

by the way, i was able to add lots of pictures from India onto my flickr. if you want to see some snapshots from my adventures so far, check out www.flickr.com/cassieruso. it's a lot easier than putting them on here :) sorry!

God Bless You all and Peace be with you. I pray that you all can abide in the love of Christ,
Cassie

Pushkar Pictures

Here are pictures from last weekend at Pushkar, for the camel fair.

Hey guys
What up? Quite a bit going on here! I'm packing for my weekend trip to Jaisalmer. It's an overnight train that will take about 12 hours. This is actually going to be my first time on a train so i'm kind of excited :) Jaisalmer is in the desert, really close to Pakistan. Please pray for us to be safe. We're going on a camel safari halloween night and sleeping out in the desert, which i am so excited for!
Today i saw some elephants on the road for the first time. They are so my favorite animal now :) They had painted faces and stuff.
I have completely been won over by the Indian head bob. I do it all the time now. That will be a hard habit to break! :)
This week was my first week of working alone in my school. I am really tired and a bit worn out, but i think that's partly just natural because i've been here for 2 weeks now and the adrenaline is wearing off. The kids are really wild and i have a big class-20 kids. Most are 2-3 yrs old and can't do anything and there are about 4 kids who have the capacity to learn and are willing to learn. the ones in between are old enough, but just too naughty. I have a translator, Gopal, who s teaching with me. We've started splitting the kids into 2 groups-those who can learn and those who can't-and he teaches one group while i teach the other. It works prety well, but it means that i can't understand what the kids are saying and they can only understand a couple words that i say. i know sit, write, thank you, and no haha that's about it. it's very frusterating sometimes, but i always have chances everyday to show them a little bit of God's love. Like the first day, little Sopa (actually i think her name might be Shopa) came up to me and hung on my leg so i picked her up and she touched my face that way that babies do, and then she laid her head on my shoulder and i rocked her to sleep. Later on, i was thinking about it and i don't know if you remember but in an earlier post when i talked about who woud actually care for these children, one of the things i said was "who will rock little sopa to sleep?" God provided :) I was pretty psyched when i realized that.
I really, REALLY miss Christians. I took having other believers around all the time for granted. It's just so hard sometimes! i am submerged in a place where everyone around me has a different kind of lifestyle, and different beilefs. Not just the Indians, but the people i live with too. I love them all, but it's so good to talk to people who believe what you beilieve. Like, i see God in everything. In a beautiful day, in "coincidences" i believe to be God's favor, in healing, etc. and usually i can voice this-usually i can praise God by talking to other people about it. And every week i loved going to church and going to EvenSong for worship with my friends, and praying with people when they needed it or i needed it. It's great that i'm here with people who beileve different things because i can be a light in darkness-i've already had a few conversations with other voluneteers about God-but i feel like i'm givnig out without getting back much "soul food". instead it's like always being on defense. I can find solace in my Bible, but it's different than talking to people and looking at their faces and i don't know how to explain it but it's just something i miss. The ambience is different. I am willing to do this and i'm glad God put me here and i know it's right, but it's very hard. I just want to have a nice conversation with a fellow disciple and a hug :) since that probably won't happen unless one of you flies out here, how about you guys tell me anything you've learned or heard lately-a devotion or something interesting from a sermon or maybe just something new you just realized about your faith? I'm really spiritually hungry right now :) The more, the merrier! Thank you! and i am so grateful to have all of you in my life! You are wonderful. I am so blessed to be surrounded by such strong, faithful, good people. I miss you tons! But it's good here too. Don't think i feel regretful for being here or sad; i just need some fuel :) Thank you for your prayers-i have had so many little miracles everyday i couldn't deny that there was a God if i tried, or that prayers work. Love you guys, and talk to you again soon!
Cassie

Pushkar was awesome

Wow! i have so much to write about! First of all, HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO ALIVIA!!!!! I love you monkey biscuit and you were the first thing on my mind on the morning of October 24th! :) I can't believe you are a big 4 year old already! Livy baby, you are so sweet (to me, at least) and i love watching you run through your life without any fear (like when you jump off the stairs without telling me, expecting me to catch you anyways). I hope you had a wonferful birthday, and when i get back we're gonna play some sweet Polly Pockets-you be Dida and i be Breakah ;)
And Happy 20th Bday to Brittany!! woot woot. Al Monet de Leche forever girl :) :) :)

Do you ever wake up in the morning and it takes you a sec to remember where you are? Saturday morning i woke up to Indian voices and a bare Indian foot inches from my face. I saw a worn white ledge and a colorful pillow with camels on it. I heard peacocks, cows, camels, people, music, and dogs. Oh Yea, how could i forget? I'm on a volunteer's friend's rooftop in the desert valley Pushkar, on a farm. The stars were insane sweet! We even saw the milky way! it was pretty cold, and a random dog came and slept with us for awhile, but i think those just added flavor to the adventure :) Pushkar is a beautiful city! Lots of old buildings that are painted mouth-watering colors like sky blue and sherbert orange. The people were mostly very friendly, although they were used to tourists so a lot of them could be pretty sneaky (i had to pry my hand away from a woman who was going to force me to get henna so she could charge me a ridic amount of money). My favorite part of the weekend was going to the camel area on the outskirts of the town. There were HUNDREDS of camels-probably thousands! and groups of old men in turbans and white outfits sat around. Outside the town it becomes even more desert-like. it was all sand and stone with mountains around, and REALLY hot. Especially with all our clothes. And the smell of India is so heavy, it feels like yet another layer of clothing. But you get over it, and i guess it's better than being surrounded by a bunch of dirty snowdrifts! :) So we walked around looking at camels and i asked a guy if i could take his picture. Then all these other camel guys wanted their picture taken as well. It ended up that there were a big group of them all together smiling for our cameras, and then us girls had to take turns sitting with them because they wanted to have a pic with us. :) very fun. I just plopped right down on their dusty blanket and smiled while an ancient National Geographic style man slung his arm over my shoulder. that's one for the books i'd say?
I think i may end up having a bit of a european accent when i get back-most the volunteers are european :) today we were in a restaurant and a couple from arkansas started talking to us and when i said i was from MI, they said "we thought you were from Great Britain!" I'll prolly come back demading Nutella on my toast and ordering "chips" at McDonalds on take-away.
So, all jokes aside, i love India. I really do. But i am kind of struggling with staying focused on my purpose here. I came here for a completely selfless reason-God wanted me to come so i put my other plans aside and came-but i feel like it's turning into selfishness. I find myself doing things because i want to do them. I'm starting to act like this is a vacation-I've reached a point where i'm safely in a comfort zone and not being pushed anymore. It's not bad for me to enjoy what i'm doing, but not like this somehow. Going on trips and going shopping with volunteers...my main focus isn't on the people of India and what i can give them. It's becoming what i can get from India. I want to give all i have for God's plan, not this lolly-gagging business. Maybe it's a lack of courage? i don't know. But please pray for me to get out of this standstill.
I think part of the problem was that i spent all that time being pushed and growing leading up to coming here. It took so much trust and faith in God, and the travels over here even more. And now i'm here, and i have to make that transition into putting the pplan in action, and i don't know how so i'm stalling. What good is my loving them going to do anyways? How could that be all i need to do? People are people, loved or not. Loved people still need to eat. Loved people still need to defend themselves. But then i hear that voice inside say, "whose love are you talking about? Yours can't provde those things, but Mine can. It does everyday for you." and then i think "well, then You do it! How am i supposed to give Your love when all i have is mine to give? i can't give someone else's love" and then "You are a vessel. I fill you up with My love when you give Me all of yours. Then all you have left to give is Mine." Wow. it makes perfect sense. God is so good, all the time. He has never once fallen short, He has never once withheld anything from the moment He told me to come here. He has kept His end of the bargain completely, even as i fail to always keep mine. I am so frustrated sometimes with being a weak, sinful human being! But i guess it's good that I am, because it drives me closer to Him, who makes me holy and strong. That's all for now other people want to use the computer, but i'll keep you guys updated. Keep me in check to make sure i'm staying on task please :) and thank you all for reading this and sending me all the comments on here and facebook and stuff. It makes my day reading them :) Love you and God bless,
Cassie

Sorry about the delay

namaste :) how is everybody doing? sorry i haven't written this week-our comuter at the house is broken so today some of us girls went to the internet cafe. the computers are like, windows 98 and most the keys are worn off but we'll manage haha. sorry for any spelling errors :)
today i had my first "runs" experience after being constipated for 9 days...ugh. but i feel a bit better now. i had way too much indian food stuck in my little body :)
Let's see...what else...
I started work on wednesday. it's crazy! i thought i'd seen where Indian people live; I thought i'd seen the slums. But no sir i had no idea until i turned a corner and walked a kilometer and watched te buildings gradually dissappear and then a huge scrubby fenced in field with goats and children and FILLED with trash. Everything was so dusty and there were a bunch of ramshackle cement rooms that were houses. The women and children were very nice-smiling and saying hello and thankfully not begging for money (in the city you get practically attacked by beggars). The men are the same everywhere-always flirting haha. you get used to it. I met one of the IDE project coordinators, Shuchi and she is pretty much the coolest lady ever. She tells it how it is and something makes people listen to her, even though she's probably not even 5 ft tall. :)
There are 2 "schools" in the slums and i'm working in the newer, less established one. it's the worst of the worst. the lowest of the low. the dirtiest of the dirty. The class is sporatic-the kids are 1-12 yrs old (but many don't know how old they are) and come and go as they please. The school is a little cement room like the homes there. one window with no screen and a broken cement floor. We have some mice that run around and look at us with beady little eyes. The gov provided these schools with a teacher and a helper each, but these women don't really do anything with the children, besides beat them if theyre loud. they get paid gov salary and have the job forever, no matter how bad they are. this is why IDEX sent us here-they hope that we will motivate the teacher and helper and children. Volunteers usually end up teaching and making the lessons, and teachers occasionally help. they're nice to have around for translating because the kids don't know english. the volunteer who i was with at this school leaves today so after 2 days of watching her i'm on my own. teaching around 20 Hindi children English and math which they forget by the next day. I'm not going to get frustrated though. I keep being reminded by that still small voice inside "You are here to love". If they learn anything from me, i want them to learn that they are worth something-that they're a treasure. Their sweet smiles and their innocsence and their vivacity for life. AHHH!! who will watch over them? Who will keep little NaNa from prostititution? Who will rock Sopa to sleep? Who will help Pudja to learn things since she's always behind?
There is a bunch of information and ideas floating around in my head. I feel like i'm in a super intense world cultures class! There are so many issues that are tied up in customs and behaviors and traditions and yet it's still important that Indian heritage be preserved. Like prego women for example. Many muslim women beliee children are gifts, and so they have zero prevention. But all these children are born and they can't be provided for. At the same time that they want these women to take birth control and et abortions, they're trying to save their lies too. Like prego women here need tetnus shots because they have babies at home in insanitary conditions and the babies and mothers often die without it. 300 women die everyday in childbirth. If you bring abortions to india though, how would these women even afford it? that would bring in the ally-abortions then, causing more deaths. Condoms of course would be a good introduction here, but men ar very careless-i don't think they'd take the responsibility. So many things-the trash here (no public trashcans)...even the schools. bringing in english volunteers is great and all, but it means that the children are leanring about a country's seasons and customs that they don't beloing to. they need to survive HERE, first. ay yay yay. no more of this.
i'm leaving to pushkar this weekend to go to a camel festival so i won't be around until sunday. just wanted to warn you guys :) send me messages-i like to read about what's going on with you guys and what you think and alll that stuff! take care and God Bless!
Cassie

All ya Need is Love

Hey guys! Well, it is pretty sweet over here on this side of the world, i must admit. Although, i'd advise any visitors to stay away from the grss (it's full of burrs). I went into an empty lot to take pictures of some flowers and when i got back on the street, me and the others were COVERED in them. they were impossible! But today we went to a nature reserve that was so pretty! there were monkies, antelope, peacocks, goats, and lots of birds. The crickets sound like rattle snakes which was pretty scary at first. We hiked up a mountain there and saw all of Jaipur. That would be the second time this week i've hiked up a mountain-both times i didn't plan on it so i was wearing a dress and flip flops! figures. Don't underestimate a girl in a dress and flip flops :) No majjor mishaps, except i kind of freaked out when a giant ant fell on my head. No harm done though.
I went to the market the other day and it was so busy and chaotic and awesome! Everyone tries to get you to buy their stuff and children hover around, asking for money. Indian music is blaring and you smell all sorts of foods and garbage and urine (men pee wherever they please). I took lots of pictures, but i can't add them from this computer and mine can't get internet just yet.
A friend here gave me a chunk of his sugarcane stalk which was delish. I felt pretty native chewing on a piece of sugarcane. Also i like all the Indian commercials haha. they have a cream to lighten skin tones, which i thought was interesting since girls back home buy tinted lotion to darken theirs! Other funny ones are a dad telling his son that his mom is prego (even though you'd think he'd notice since she looks 8 mths along!) and a girl 'seductively' dancing in the rain in her sari, advertising deoderant :)
We eat pretty much the same stuff every day-rice, veggies, and chopatti (all different pita-like breads). Today we went to this place called "the dairy" which is just what it says. It's next door to the place where they milk the cows. You go to different windows to get "softies", kulfi, hard icecream in a cup, some wierd drink, milk, or milk shakes. These things are all a bit different from what you'd get in the states, but good none the less :) Also there are these addictive pretzel-like things caled jubati-crispy twists covered in sugary syrup stuff. those things are the bomb...between those and Maaza, a mango nectar drink, i think i can deal with the veggies and rice :)
I feel like i'm starting to understand love. true love. The love of God. It's a bit different and feels different from what i thought love was before. it's more relaxed and inclusive. it's like a presence-it's everywhere. it coveres everything-enemies, friends and family, the lost, the hurt, the broken, children and old people, mean people, nice people. it's unescapable. Not sure how to describe it. I always liked what Paul had to say about the love of Christ in the new testament, but now i feel like a light turned on-i don't just like the sound but i UNDERSTAND it. I feel it all around me and don't know how anyone could ever not feel it. and it makes God's existance so undoubtedly true too. He's just so GREAT! :) well, that's all my ranting for the day
love you guys! Have peace and know that you are ALWAYS loved, whther you want to be or not. :)
Cassie

I'm Here!

Hello everyone,
Wow! have i only been gone a couple days? it feels like a few weeks! I got here yesterday morning and slept most of yesterday. I had culture shock and jetlag and yea...i'd rather not talk about it. Today is a new day though-i just took a shower (no heated water) which was nice and refreshing :) There are a lot of other people at the volunteer house-prolly around 12-16. I share my room with 3 other girls.
I don't know what else to say...this city is hot but not too bad. It's mostly all different shades of brown. There are cows and dogs everywhere, and i saw a couple camels on the road yesterday. I haven't taken a single picture, but there's time enough for that. It's very loud here, especially on the streets. The rickshaws (toot toots) honk and drive with abandon :) it's pretty wild.
My mind has been stripped of everything except a few Bible verses and prayers. To be honest with you all, i miss you terribly. I miss being around people who love me. But i need to focus on being here. There is no use in my going to India if i focus on how much i miss everyone. It's all about where i'm focused.
Mom, i don't know if you check this blog but if not, i'm sure Non will tell you. I cannot use skype here at the house-the internet is here (im on it) but not very reliable and there's no microphone on the community computer. i can only use my laptop at a cafe, but i don't have very many rupees because we're in the middle of a festival and i can't change over my money for a couple days. Also, they don't sell cell phones to foreigners. There is a phone here however that can only recieve calls which you can call to get ahold of me. The number is 001 91 141 272 3174. I'm going to the market to look around (and try to stay awake instead of hiding away in bed all day) but i think mabe i'll be back by 4 my time? Try to call then. Maybe 5. Sorry i don't know exactly! We'll figure out a schedule. I'm sorry i didn't talk long yesterday but i felt really sick and i was homesick on top of that so i didn't want to make it worse by talking. Well, i better get going. I love you all and miss you! Don't be too worried about me-God is with me wherever i go. He will never leave me nor forsake me. (thanks Trudy!) I can't believe God thinks i am strong enough for this. I had no idea. But well, I'm here now so I'm just going to have to take His word for it :)
Love, Cassie

We Die to Live

Hey Everybody! Tomorrow is the big day. I leave for O'Hare in the morning and fly out at 4 p.m. on Wednesday. At 9 p.m. Thursday, i will reach New Delhi, India and then i have a 9 hour layover. At 6 a.m. Friday morning I get on a little plane that will take me to Jaipur, India. And then i will finally be there! :) I have just about everything i need, and i think i'll get around to packing sometime today...

Everyone asks me what I'm feeling at this point. Excited? Nervous? A little doubtful? I can't really explain what i feel...not any particular emotion. I mostly feel focused. I know what I am doing and I know it's the right thing. It's like i have tunnel vision or something-all i see is India and all i feel is God by my side. I have absolutely, 100% NO doubts about what i am doing. I know with complete certainty that this is God's plan-that He wants me to go with Him. This is a huge relief-I don't feel any fear because no matter what happens, i know that i am supposed to go. There are no if's or but's. I went out on a limb here, trusting God to meet me halfway, and He is. I feel very satisfied and grounded, like when you know you made it to the right place at the right time.

One of my favorite illustrations Jesus made is in John 12, about wheat. A grain of wheat is alone unless it falls to the ground and dies. By dying, it comes alive again and multiplies. It's mostly about Jesus Himself, but when i read this i am reminded that in order to really live, I have to "die". i can't keep my life on earth all to myself-i have to give it up to God in order for Him to use me. If I keep everything I have to myself-if I make decisions based on what I want instead of what God wants, I won't grow to anywhere near my potential.
I have been given eternal life, which is not so much about quantity of years but the quality of my years. I don't want to waste that. I am not a Christian so that i can go to heaven; I am a Christian so that i can live a life full of meaning and help others live a life of meaning also. I want to become fully formed in Christ-and by doggedly following Him no matter the cost, i can become like Him a little more each day. God has a LIFE plan for each and every one of us that will fit us perfectly. If only we surrender our lives-then we can truly live.

The Kingdom of God is HERE. It doesn't start when we die and go to heaven-we are apart of the Kingdom of God the moment we're saved. And we are the only hope there is for bringing others into the Kingdom. Jesus already came and died and set everything up. If we don't say anything about the reason for the peace within us, NO ONE WILL. If we don't share our faith, NO ONE WILL. We are God's plan for bringing home lost sheep.

I hope that you are all listening to God for what His plan is for your life. But remember that everyday, you are where you are for a reason. Whether it is to give or recieve encouragement, pray that God will show you what He wants you to do each day. For me it's been hard to remember that. In all the excitement of leaving the country, i have had to constantly remind myself that i haven't left yet. God uses me here too. I should be just as active in my beliefs here as i will be in India.

Well, that was a bit heavier than i expected to be today, but there it is :) I would ask that you guys pray for my family. I know it's hard for them to let me go, and they need peace. Thank you once again for everything you guys have done to help me out! We are all a community together-I can't stand alone.
The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make His face shine upon you, and be gracious to you; the Lord lift up His countenance upon you, and give you peace. (Numbers 6:24-26)

Go and be Blessed :)
Love, Cassie

Not By My Power

Hello everyone! hope you're all doing fine. Just to let you know, i am leaving in 2 weeks (oct. 14)! wowzers...it snuck up on me :) Not too much excitement around here yet...although i got my visa which was pretty cool. I will probably get my travel insurance today or tomorrow. There are a lot of little things i need to take care of-getting some sort of money belt, proper clothing, gulping vitamins, a bag for my camera and laptop, getting everyone's skypes, and trying to wrap my brain around what i'm doing.

At the beginning of all this, i thought that getting ready for the trip meant shedding all of my problems and being perfect by the time i left, so that i would be strong enough to bring people to Christ. In these past months though, I have found that the truth is I will never be ready in that sense. I am a human being. Even when i do get past problems, more will await me. God is the one with the power. He is taking me with Him, not because i am strong but because i am willing. :) How awesome is that?! My weaknesses only show that God is strong enough to overcome them.

That realization really hit home one day this summer, while i was babysitting my cousin Alivia. I woke up grumpy that morning, and continued to be so throughout the day. Not very Christ-like, if you want the truth. I didn't want to play with her, and i wasn't in the mood to teach her anything or tell her stories like usual. It was on this day that God chose to work in Alivia's heart. Sitting at the table coloring, she started asking me about God and at one point her eyes just lit up, and she grabbed my hand and said "let's pray so Jesus comes into my heart." We prayed and our little Alivia is saved :) On my worst day, God used me to lead my cousin into making the most important decision of her life. That's when i realized that God doesn't need me to be perfect to carry out His will. Like i heard in church a few weeks ago, "Christianity is one beggar telling another where to find bread."

I am as ready as i will ever be to go to India, because God is with me, and when God is with me, who can be against me? "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God." (2 Corinth. 1:3-4) God is the one who comforts us, through each other. Beyond our problems, God can shine through and give others peace.

Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit (Romans 14:21). That's my prayer for all of you as you go about your day. Remember that even weaknesses can shed light on the awesome power of God. If we were all perfect and strong, what need would there be for a Savior to lean on?

Excited

Hey Everyone,
I thought i'd try making a blog for all of you to follow rather than boring old-fashioned email updates :P

I have already paid for Room and Board, and today i bought my plane ticket! God is so awesome-i have known that this was God's plan for the next step in my life, but it still feels so cool when He acts on it, providing everything i need for the trip. Today i also got a free subscription to learn Hindi on itunes :)

My greatest concern this summer has been preparing spiritually for India. I know that although physically and mentally i will probably be pushed to my limits, I will be pushed spiritually even more. I will be in a place for once where i may not see even one fellow believer all day. Everything i do is a reflection of what i believe; for some around me it may be the only reflection of christianity they see in their life! I need to be prepared, so that when someone asks me the reason for my peace, i can tell them. And above all, i am learning to trust God more than i ever have. He can do amazing things-more than i could ever imagine.

Thank you all so much for your support-whether financially or by prayer, or encouraging me when you didn't even realize that i needed some-i am incredibly grateful. I have been both enlightened and humbled, simply in the preparation for India...I can't imagine what God is going to teach me once i actually get there! :) And by having a hand in this awesome thing that God is doing, God sees you as being there with me. We are all unified in our Christ, one body. Working to share the boundless love of God with people who have never experienced this kind before. Wow! Can you imagine?! Many of these street children have been ignored and treated like they were worthless their whole lives, and I cannot wait for them to find out that someone loves them so much that He'd die for them. We all are blessed enough to see it :)